


Cousland's First Kiss

by DualWieldingCousland (DualWieldingMama)



Series: Cousland, the younger years [2]
Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age: Origins
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-26
Updated: 2015-04-26
Packaged: 2018-03-25 21:32:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,333
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3825805
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DualWieldingMama/pseuds/DualWieldingCousland
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A moment from Regan Cousland's past.  When Fergus got married, Regan apparently didn't realize that meant he wouldn't always have time for his kid sister.  At least she has friends ... like Nate.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Cousland's First Kiss

**Author's Note:**

> Nothing beyond kissing happens; Regan's only 14, here, people. In my head, Nathaniel & Ser Gilmore are only a couple years older than her, and Fergus is a couple years older than that.

“Come back here, young lady!” Eleanor Cousland’s voice could be heard echoing through the halls as she called for her daughter. But Regan ignored the teyrna, tearing through the castle hallways fighting back tears of frustration. She hated when her mother started in on the crusade to marry her off to some noble family or another. She hated the idea of having no say in who she would marry. She was fourteen, for the Maker’s sake. Why did she even want to think about that now?

Bryce shook his head and sighed, resting a hand on his wife’s shoulder. “Give her time, love,” he consoled. “Fergus wasn’t too fond of the idea when you first told him, remember?” Their son had been almost as upset as his sister at the idea of an arranged marriage, but things had seemingly worked out in his favor. Oriana was more than they’d hoped for when the marriage was contracted. He wasn’t sure he wanted his daughter to have no say in who she married, but perhaps they would find someone that could appeal to her more adventurous nature. 

“It’s not as though I’m sending her off with some troll of a man,” Eleanor said in an exasperated voice. “The Vaels are good people, and I’ve been assured the youngest prince is a good man, and a good-looking one at that. Sebastian might not even mind her … quirks.” She just didn’t understand why her daughter insisted on behaving more like her brother than the young woman she was becoming. “Lorainne Trevelyan’s son is just a year or two younger than she is, and Urien assures me that his son would be a good match for her as well. I just want her to meet the boys. Is that too much to ask?”

Bryce kept trying to convince his wife that everything would work out, though he had his doubts. While he thought highly of the Trevelyans – Eleanor had grown up with the matriarch of that family, the idea of his little girl being married off to Vaughan Kendalls was rather chilling; he’d heard too many stories of how Urien’s son treated women. Of this Sebastian and the Vaels, he knew little other than that they were the ruling family of Starkhaven; they were friends of his wife’s family. He’d never met them, but that didn’t mean much; he’d never met Oriana’s family until she came over from Antiva. But things had worked out well between Fergus and his new wife, so far, and even Regan seemed to have taken to the woman, though they had their occasional arguments over Regan’s attire and behavior.

Regan sped through the hallways, not paying attention to where she was going. She was tired of her mother going on and on about how she should meet this noble or that noble ‘because he would make a good husband’. They’d married Fergus off to some foreign woman of good standing … wasn’t that enough? They now had one of the best trade agreements with Antiva, better than even the king had, thanks to that marriage. Did they really need to try for the same with her? She was so focused on her thoughts that she didn’t see the person standing in front of her until it was too late. 

“Oof! Why don’t you watch where you’re going?” A red-haired boy a few years older than her turned to glare, ready to reprimand whatever servant had run into him when he noticed the actual culprit laying on the ground. “I’m so sorry, Lady Regan,” Roland Gilmore gasped, recognizing her. “I thought you were a servant, not paying attention. Let me help you up.” He extended his hand, pulling her to her feet easily. He hoped he hadn’t hurt her somehow, but hadn’t she been the one to run into him?

“Thank you, Roland,” she answered, clasping his hand tightly. When she was upright again, she hugged her friend. “You know you don’t have to call me Lady Regan, right?” she asked, smirking. They had played together for as long as she could remember; he’d arrived at the castle almost eight years ago and, along with Fergus, the trio had been nearly inseparable, even taking weapons training together. Hearing her friend use her title was just … strange. 

“I know,” he admitted, grinning down at her. “But eventually, you’ll be a proper lady and I’ll have to.” He knew that if he was ever granted full knighthood in her father’s service, he would be expected to treat her with the upmost respect and that included using the titles she hated. “I figure I should at least start getting into the practice. You ready for class this evening?” He enjoyed facing off against the girl and her brother during their classes. Out of all the students, they were usually the most enthusiastic opponents. It didn’t hurt that they were always trying to one-up each other.

She stuck her tongue out at the thought of ever becoming a ‘proper lady’, as he put it. The mere thought of traipsing around in the castle in a gown made her ill. Regan was ever so thankful that her father, at least, seemed inclined to let her do as she wished, rather than adhere to the things her mother expected. “I’m always ready for class,” she laughed, nodding. She enjoyed being the only girl in weapons training, especially when she managed to beat one of the boys. And she was getting better and better. “I’ve got some frustration to work out; Mother is talking about marrying me off to some stranger, again.”

Roland frowned and rested a hand on her shoulder comfortingly. “It’ll work out fine, I’m sure,” he said, glancing around. He had to be careful just how he behaved with the girl. Some of the other squires enjoyed picking on anyone he seemed close to; they were jealous of his apparent prowess and looked for ways to knock him down a peg or two. “After all, I doubt your father wants to send his little girl off to some foreign land.” He knew it was common practice for nobles to angle for better positions by marrying off their children to other important nobles; it was even common practice in the Bannorn, though more often with just the eldest children. It made him thankful that he’d not been the firstborn, or even the second. It allowed him to squire in Highever … a position he was enjoying more and more every day.

“Nate and Thomas are supposed to be there too,” she informed him, choosing not to think about the whole arranged marriage thing any longer and bouncing happily on the balls of her feet. She was excited to see Nathaniel Howe again; they always had fun together, and she was picking up all sorts of interesting tricks from him. She was less thrilled to have Thomas around. Often, she, Nathaniel and Fergus would have to hide from Thomas; the boy had a bad habit of tattling on them. “Rendon dropped them, and Delilah, off on his way to meet with someone near Orzammar.”

“Now, young lady,” Roland teased, tugging lightly on her ponytail. “You know you’re supposed to use his title when talking about the arl.” He knew she didn’t like Rendon Howe … he didn’t either, really. But she had to be respectful; you never knew who might overhear in the hallways. So he’d taken to reminding her whenever she dropped someone’s title. 

“Ugh,” she grumbled, crossing her arms. “Fine. Arl Howe dropped them off. Better?” When he nodded, she sighed. “I’m going to go find Fergus and Nate. I want to do something fun, and I know you have to patrol with Ser Isaac.” She’d learned Roland’s schedule quickly, since he often spent his off days keeping her entertained. They would often go riding, or work on her sword-handling further. She hated the days he spent on his duties as a squire; it was sometimes so hard to keep entertained.

“Be good, Regan,” he laughed, giving her a quick hug. He had to admit, he enjoyed the days he could spend with her and her brother, rather than with the knights, but he wanted to make his father proud. Plus, the sooner he reached full knighthood, the sooner he could go about buying things for the girl he’d grown quite fond of. “I’ll see you and your brother later tonight. Be ready; I’ve got some new tricks up my sleeve.”

She grinned, standing on tip-toes to kiss his cheek. “See you then, Roland!” After watching the red-head walk off, she sped toward the library. Fergus was supposed to be studying with Brother Aldous, though she’d heard rumors that his lessons were being stopped, now that he was married.  
When she reached the library, she saw Fergus and Oriana leaving, walking hand in hand. “Fergus! Oriana!” she called, running to try and catch up. “Want to go out frog-hunting?” she asked, beaming up at the pair. “Or riding? Or just regular hunting, even?” She was too excited about the prospect of doing something entertaining to notice the frown on Oriana’s face or the seemingly bored look on Fergus’

“No, Regan,” Fergus said flatly, shaking his head. “Oriana and I have things to do, and you can’t come with us.” A small part of him hated telling his little sister no; she was far less annoying than any of his friends’ siblings, but Oriana had whispered something inviting, and he didn’t want to be distracted. He was a married man now, after all. He shouldn’t have to make time for his little sister, should he? “Why don’t you go find Nathaniel … or Thomas?” 

“I’m sure Delilah would be happy to play with you,” Oriana suggested, squeezing Fergus’ hand. She liked the younger girl well enough, but she wanted to spend time with her husband, for the Maker’s sake. “I think she’s in the gardens, if you want to find her.” She didn’t notice the amused look on Fergus’ face; he knew his sister wouldn’t go near Delilah if there was any other choice.

“But why can’t I come with you?” Regan asked, pouting up at her brother. She had planned on finding Nathaniel anyway, but she wanted the three of them to do something together. They always did things as a group. When Fergus and Oriana simply repeated that she couldn’t, she kicked at the wall just beside her brother and took off running again. She’d just go find Nate. He’d do something fun with her. ‘Stupid Fergus,’ she thought to herself as she ran. ‘Stupid Oriana.’

She found Nathaniel at the training fields, restringing one of his bows. She sat and watched him for a few minutes, waiting for a safe time to disturb his concentration. He’d taught her several years ago that it wasn’t smart to distract someone with a partially attached bowstring in his hands; it was far too easy for the string to snap back and hurt someone. When it was safe, she called out his name, unable to stop the grin as he turned to face her. 

“Well, if it isn’t little Regan,” he teased, picking her up in a hug. He was only two years older than she was, but he was a good head taller, much to her dismay. “I figured you’d be off with your brother, tormenting his blushing bride.” He laughed as she frowned, shaking her head. It amazed him how much he enjoyed her company. Most of the younger girls he knew were annoyingly like his older sister. Delilah seemed to be interested in nothing but clothes and which nobleman was worth her time this week. But Regan … she was different.

“Let’s go do something!” She grabbed his arm and tried tugging him to his feet, catching him off guard. That was one of the things he adored about her; he never knew what she would do from one minute to the next. “Come on, Nate,” she urged, grinning when he finally got to his feet. In all honesty, as much as she liked spending time with her brother and Roland and Nathaniel together, she loved spending time with just Nathaniel as well. He never made her feel like a little girl, despite his annoying nickname for her. Plus, he would always teach her things that her brother and the red-head didn’t seem to know. He’d taught her how to shoot a bow several years ago and still was willing to work with her, helping her get better and better. He taught her the basics of lock-picking, much to her nanny’s eventual dismay. Nan now dreaded when the Howes came for visits; she had to start locking her room to keep the children from playing pranks on her. 

“Well, what did you have in mind?” he asked, letting himself be pulled along behind the girl. She was stronger than a lot of people gave her credit for, but he could stop their forward progress if her request was too outlandish. “We could take a couple horses out for a ride,” he suggested, trying to think of something she might want to do. “Or maybe work on your archery a little more?”

“Let’s go find out what Fergus is doing,” she said suddenly. The idea had come to her out of the blue, but it was perfect. She could find out just what was so important that her brother couldn’t be bothered to have her along and possibly find a way to pester him. Plus, she’d get to spend time with Nathaniel. It was a win-win situation for her. “And after … maybe we can work on the archery?” Then, it would be time for training, so she’d still get to spend time with Nate, and Roland.

“Fair enough,” Nathaniel laughed. “Maybe we’ll see if he wants to come along too?” He noticed she didn’t respond, but figured she was too focused on tracking down her brother. They found Fergus easily enough; the elder Cousland and Oriana were just leaving the kitchens with a blanket and a basket in tow. Before he could call out to his friend, however, Regan shushed him and shoved him into the shadows. “What’s going on, Regan?”

“They were mean to me,” Regan explained in a hushed voice. “I asked if we could go do something fun and they told me to get lost.” She tried to keep from pouting; she needed to pay attention to where the couple was going. “You’re good at sneaking around,” she pointed out, whirling to face her companion. “Help me follow them without getting caught?”

He should say no. He should point out that her brother was now married and needed some time alone with his wife. But the idea of following the older boy was too enticing. After all, if he was going off with his new wife, things might get … interesting. It didn’t occur to him that his cohort might not need to see what would likely go on. “Oh, why not,” he answered with a hushed laugh. He liked a challenge, and this could prove to be just that. “Follow me, and stay to the shadows.”

The pair slipped along as quietly as possible, darting between shadows as quickly as possible. On the rare occasion that Fergus or Oriana turned to look behind them, the pair darted down a corridor or hid behind nearby objects. Regan made sure to pay attention to how Nathaniel moved, storing that information away for a time when he might not be around. They followed the couple out to the stables, remaining outside the barn when the pair went in. 

“The hayloft?” Regan suggested, peeking through one of the windows. The hayloft would give them easy access to spy while also keeping them hidden from view. Plus, it was easy enough to get to, even outside the barn. A few years back, Roland had hooked up a climbing rope to use as a training tool. Using the rope, Regan and Nathaniel scaled the barn’s outer wall and slipped into the hayloft making only the slightest bit of noise.

“What was that?” she could hear Oriana ask in a worried tone. The Antivan was still not completely comfortable with the amount of wilderness that surrounded Highever, though she was working on adapting. 

“It’s probably just a cat,” Fergus consoled, glancing upwards. “Father keeps a few out here to keep the mice out of the feed.” He idly wondered what Regan had found to do instead of following him around. He’d felt bad, telling her to go away, but things were going to have to change, now that he was married. He was trying to think of ways to explain and apologize to his sister when Oriana leaned over to distract him.

Once they were both safely inside, Regan and Nathaniel peaked over the edge of the hayloft, easily finding the couple below them. They had spread their blanket out, but they were ignoring the basket of food. Instead, the pair was locked in an embrace that made Regan sigh with frustration. Pushing away from the edge, she sat up and grumped. “If that’s all they were gonna do, why didn’t they just tell me?” She turned to look at Nathaniel and wondered if he was as bored with their targets as she was. “I mean … I wanted to do something fun. If all they were gonna do was paw at each other, he just had to say so and I would have left them alone. That can’t be fun.”

Nathaniel had to fight to keep from laughing out loud at her statement. Did she really think kissing wasn’t fun? Surely someone had tried to kiss her by now. She was attractive enough; she’d already started filling out and the way her hair fell loosely around her face, even when the majority was pulled back, made her seem older than she was. “You don’t think that’s fun?” he whispered, sitting up. He’d kissed his fair share of girls, much to his younger brother’s dismay. While he’d found it enjoyable, things never progressed further than a few such embraces. He’d always held onto the semi-romantic notion that if a relationship was worth pursuing, there would be some sort of … sign … in that first kiss. So far, he’d been disappointed. “I bet Thomas would love to show you just how fun it could be.” He teased, reaching out to nudge her gently. 

“Ugh,” Regan practically spat, shaking her head. “I swear, your brother is one of the most annoying human beings in all of Thedas, followed closely by your sister.” She shuddered, trying to erase the thought of Thomas Howe coming anywhere near her. He’d apparently decided when he was five that the two of them would marry one day, and since then had made a regular pain of himself. It was all she could do to be in same room without strangling him. “If it comes down to never finding out what fun is or having your brother show me, I’ll go with never knowing fun.” She sighed and looked back over the edge at her brother and his wife. The pair hadn’t noticed their audience; they were far too engrossed in each other. “It just looks like he’s trying to eat her face.”

Nathaniel risked a glance over the edge and saw something the girl apparently hadn’t. Not only were the couple’s mouths busy; their hands were moving over various parts that made him think the two would want their privacy. Carefully, he shifted his weight and started to move away from the edge, reaching out to drag the girl with him. “Come here, you,” he whispered when she tried to pull away. “I bet I can convince you that it is fun.” The words were out of his mouth before he could stop himself, causing him to look at the girl in a whole new light. 

He’d known her for years. Their parents were close friends, after all, and there had been talk, once, of marrying Delilah off to Fergus. But that had fallen through. He’d grown up with her, for Andraste’s sake. She was like a younger sister to him, wasn’t she? Then why did he suddenly have this urge to take her in his arms? Why was it that her curious stare suddenly made him want to kiss her, not just to show her that it was fun, but to show her how much he wanted to kiss her. He was suddenly very nervous as he waited for her response, feeling butterflies in his stomach for the first time that he could remember.

“I’ll bet you can’t,” she teased, apparently oblivious to thoughts suddenly assailing him. It was always entertaining to see what he’d do if she doubted his ability to prove something. She’d ended up with some rather nice weapons as a result of such taunting. She wasn’t entirely sure what she could get out of this particular challenge, though. She ignored the butterflies that suddenly attacked her belly; there was nothing to be nervous about. This was just Nate, right?

Nathaniel grinned, trying not to let on just how nervous he was. He reached out and pulled her gently toward him; he didn’t want to hurt or scare her, after all. “You sure about that?” he whispered, leaning over to bring his lips right up to her ear. “You sure you want to bet against me?”

Was she sure? Suddenly, she wasn’t sure of anything but the shiver that ran down her spine as his breath tickled her ear. Surely it was just her imagination, wasn’t it? Steeling herself, she nodded, pulling back enough to look into his eyes. There was a strange glimmer in them that she couldn’t remember seeing before. “I’m sure,” she whispered, biting her lip. 

“Well, then,” he murmured, shifting and leaning in, “just relax and do what comes naturally.” He heard a sharp intake of breath just before brushing his lips against hers. He kept things light and gentle at first, though every fiber of his being was screaming for more. He felt her tense up, as if she was unsure of what he was doing or what she should do. But then, she started relaxing, mimicking the simple movements and even going so far as to take the initiative. 

She was nervous when they started, and she couldn’t have explained why. Maybe it was that tiny voice at the back of her mind warning her that this could change everything between Nathaniel and her. But she didn’t care. Soon, she had her arms wrapped around him. One hand was clutching his shoulder, the other running fingers through his hair as she climbed into his lap. While she still didn’t understand why Fergus hadn’t just told her what he and Oriana had planned on doing, she did have to admit she was having fun. It was just … a different kind of fun.

Maker’s breath, she was a fast study. Nathaniel groaned softly when she climbed into his lap, and prayed that she wouldn’t notice how she was making him react. He wasn’t sure he was quite ready to explain that to her. But he didn’t want to stop. He’d had no idea that it would feel this good; none of the other girls he’d kissed had made him feel so … electrified when their tongues started twisting together. When she finally pulled back, apparently needing to breathe, he fought to control his heart, watching her skin flush a soft pink. “Well?” he asked, hoping his voice remained steady. “Still think it’s no fun?”

Regan stared at her friend, wide-eyed, as if she couldn’t believe what they’d just done. This was Nathaniel … Nate. This was the boy she’d grown up playing tag with, who’d taught her how to hit an apple on a fencepost with an arrow. Why was she suddenly feeling all self-conscious in front of him? “I … um,” she stammered, willing her heart to stop with the fluttering. She knew she was blushing; she could feel the heat in her cheeks. “I guess it was fun,” she hedged, looking away nervously. Was he laughing at her? Did he find her attempts at following his lead funny? “Did I … did I do ok?”

Did she do okay? It seemed he had lucked out and she hadn’t noticed certain things starting to rise to the occasion; that was good. But how should he answer her question? Admitting it was the most earth-moving kiss he’d experienced might be revealing too much, but then again, it was the truth. And she looked so nervous, waiting for his response …. Nathaniel reached out to pull her against him again, growling softly. “It was perfect,” he whispered before kissing her again. He would have gladly kept this up all afternoon if he hadn’t heard a familiar voice calling out their names, just outside the barn. 

“Nathaniel Howe! Lord Fergus! Lady Regan! Lady Oriana? You are needed at the castle!” Roland sighed as Ser Isaac led him around the barn, shouting for his friends. He was fairly certain at least half the people they were looking for were not in the barn. What he knew of Lady Oriana would put her as far away from the place as possible, and if Fergus was with his new wife, it would make sense that neither would be here. Regan and Nathaniel, on the other hand, were another story. The two often spent time with the horses. But he had been instructed to accompany Ser Isaac until it was time for weapons training, so there he was, calling out for the group and feeling like a right idiot.

“It’s Roland and Ser Isaac,” Regan whispered, pushing away from Nathaniel to try and compose herself. Her hair was a lost cause; the pony tail had been mussed beyond repair. However, that was a normal occurrence for her; it often got caught in brambles and tree branches as she wandered the woods. She glanced at Nathaniel and blushed at the look on his face; she’d never seen him look at anyone like that. But he’d been right; the whole kissing thing had been quite enjoyable. “I … I think I might need to try that again sometime,” she grinned, crawling over to the nearby window. “If I can find someone willing to help, that is.” She could see the red-head grumpily following the balding knight and hid a smile; she knew he hated having to track them down. 

“Fergus!” Oriana’s panicked voice echoed in the rafters. “Quickly, we must get dressed before he finds us here. Oh, how did I let you talk me into this?” Regan and Nathaniel had to fight to keep from laughing as they listened to Oriana fret and fuss while the pair did their best to hide what they’d been doing. Finally, the couple made it out, Fergus doing his best to convince Roland and Ser Isaac that they’d just been out for a picnic. He also assured the pair that Regan and Nathaniel were not in the barn. 

“I’m sure they wouldn’t have been able to sneak past such alert picnickers, my lord,” Roland teased, winking at his friend. “But just to be sure, why don’t I have a look while Ser Isaac escorts the pair of you back to the castle.” 

When Oriana attempted to chastise the red-head for his presumed familiarity, Ser Isaac spoke up, reminding the young woman that they were under orders from the teyrn to return his son, daughter, daughter-in-law and guest to the castle. Roland’s easy speech when talking with Fergus was a result of the trust the lord shared with the knight-in-training. It was not something that needed correcting. He agreed to let Roland continue searching, choosing to escort the disgruntled couple back. “I will see you back at the barracks, young man.”

“As you wish, Ser Isaac,” Roland replied with a bow. How he hated having to be so polite to that man, and how he hated being sent on such assignments. He knew Regan wouldn’t want to be taken back to the castle until she was good and ready, especially after the argument with her mother. But here he was, trying to track down the girl he’d been unable to stop thinking about and one of her best friends. There’s no telling what kind of trouble the pair of them were getting into.

“Blast it,” Nathaniel grumbled, shaking his head. Leave it to the knight-wannabe to cut this newfound enjoyment short. “He’ll find us, won’t he?” He didn’t know the squire as well as either Cousland, but what he did know indicated the boy would be thorough. Normally, it wouldn’t have bothered him, but the Maker apparently had a sense of humor when it came to His timing. 

“Yes. He’s the best of his group,” Regan proudly replied, looking around. She had the beginnings of a plan, but it would have to be put into action quickly if she didn’t want to be found soon. “Father’ll make him a knight soon, I’m sure of it.” Quickly scrambling close to the edge and peering down, she sighed. “Go that way, quietly,” she instructed, pointing along the loft to a darker corner. “I’ll get him out of the barn. When I do, go out the back gate and come jogging around like you’re looking for me.” She wasn’t sure why she didn’t want the squire learning what she’d been doing, or that she’d been in a secluded hayloft with Nathaniel, but something told her it would just be safer if he didn’t know.

“What’re you going to do?” he asked, starting to creep his way along the rafters. To move silently, he had to move very slowly, so he had plenty of time to hear her reply that he’d just have to watch and see. He hated when she said things like that, but he had to admit, he was curious. She’d picked up a lot of his tricks in the years they’d spent together, and she could think quickly on her feet. It was one of the things he loved … liked about her.

As Roland entered the barn, Regan jumped off the hayloft. It was all Nathaniel could do to keep from shouting out as he watched her land awkwardly, her ankle bending unnaturally and sending her lurching forward. The squire reached out to catch her just before she hit the ground, cradling her against his chest. “What were you thinking, young lady?” he asked, momentarily forgetting himself. That kind of jump was one even he wouldn’t consider making, but she hadn’t hesitated. “Are you alright?”

“I’m fine, Roland,” she said in an amused voice, trusting that it would carry to Nathaniel. She tried to take a few steps just to prove her point and winced as her ankle threatened to buckle underneath her. “Or … not,” she muttered, grasping the squire’s shoulders to keep from yelping. Maybe she shouldn’t have made such a daring leap after all. But it got his attention away from Nate’s hiding spot. 

“What were you doing up there, anyway, Regan?” Roland asked, shaking his head as he watched her try to fight through the pain. He guessed she sprained the ankle; it didn’t look broken to him, though it was swelling up nicely. 

“Nate bet me I couldn’t find a place to hide that he wouldn’t find,” Regan explained, again trying to take a step. She didn’t want either boy to think she was weak, but her ankle hurt. “He hasn’t found this one yet, but he will if you keep shouting. Let’s go look for him, so you don’t give away my great hiding place.” She was glad the friendship she had with the red-head allowed her the freedom to speak to him as an equal, rather than someone she needed to listen to. 

“You’re not walking anywhere,” Roland laughed, shaking his head. When she asked just what he meant by that, he scooped the girl up in his arms and cradled her against his chest. Thankful he wasn’t expected to wear full armor yet, he started heading out of the barn. “You sure Nathaniel’s not in here?” he asked, glancing over his shoulder. He really should check the rest of the building, but he couldn’t do that with her in his arms, and if he put her down, she was likely to hurt herself further.

“Roland!” Regan laughed as she was swept off her feet. “I can walk … well, hobble, you know. You don’t have to carry me.” She tried to wriggle her way down, but the squire had a good hold on her. Privately, she didn’t really mind being carried around; her ankle really did hurt. But it was the principle of the thing; she wanted to prove that she was just as tough as her playmates, and she was sure none of them would consent to being carried like this. 

“I don’t think so, my lady,” he teased, shaking his head. “Your mother would have my hide if I let you walk on that ankle.” He sighed; it was quite likely he’d get in trouble for just letting her make that jump in the first place. “I’ll take you back to the castle, then come back and try to find Nathaniel. With any luck, Ser Isaac managed to come across him while taking your brother back.”

Nathaniel couldn’t help but watch and listen as the girl convinced the squire to leave the barn, and he couldn’t help but wonder at the knot he felt in his stomach watching her be carried out in the red-head’s arms. She certainly didn’t seem to mind, but perhaps that was just because they were friends, and she was hurt. He hated that she’d managed to get hurt protecting him, but that was something he’d have to talk to her about later. Once the pair had exited the barn, he dropped to the ground and slipped out one of the stall doors. He jogged his way around the building, finally making it around to see them in the distance. Speeding up, he called out to the pair, hoping the urgency in his voice could be explained away by supposedly just seeing Regan being carried. “Roland, what happened to Regan?” he asked as he caught up, breathing heavily.

“The lady thought it would be funny to twist her ankle while …” the squire started, before earning an elbow in the stomach and a glare from the girl in his arms. That was right; she didn’t want Nathaniel to know where she’d been. Sighing, Roland shook his head and forced a smile; he hadn’t realized she had already gotten quite so strong. “while jumping out of a tree,” he finished, sticking his tongue out at Regan. It didn’t matter that he was older than either of the others, he could still behave like a child when he wanted. 

“It’s not my fault the ground decided to trip me,” Regan replied grumpily, crossing her arms. She still didn’t think she needed to be carried, but she was going to have to do some fast talking already to keep Roland out of trouble, so she didn’t want to make it any worse for him. “Besides, how else could I get my favorite soon-to-be-knight to carry me around?”

Nathaniel laughed along with Roland, but his insides were screaming. He wanted to take the girl from the squire and be the one to carry her. If he were honest with himself, he wanted to take her back to the barn and kiss her again. The feelings she stirred were like a drug, and he wanted more of it. But he didn’t want their friends to know, yet. The thought of little Regan being the one to stir these feelings in him was still … odd. “So, why do we need to go back to the castle, anyway? It’s not time for training yet, is it?”

“No, my lord,” Roland replied, slipping easily back into the formality his station dictated now that they were nearer to the courtyard. Ser Isaac would be waiting for him, ready to reprimand him for any apparent familiarity with a noble not of the Cousland line. “Truthfully, I am not certain why you all were summoned. All Ser Isaac and I were told was that you all needed to return to the castle. Perhaps it has something to do with the amount of food Nan has prepared?”

“Not another banquet!” Regan whined, covering her eyes. A banquet would mean she would be stuck in a dress, again. Her mother insisted on costuming her in such things every time a meal involved more than immediate family and the Howes. She would much rather remain in the comfortable tunic and trousers she spent most of her life in. 

Nathaniel and Roland spent the rest of the walk trying to convince Regan that a dress wasn’t necessarily a bad thing. Each thought she looked rather fetching in the gowns her mother had made for her. It was a losing argument, each knew, but that only made it easier to speak their minds. 

The rest of Nathaniel’s visit went quickly; he didn’t have much of an opportunity to spend time alone with Regan again. Fergus, apparently feeling guilty about sending his sister off, made sure to be around the rest of the time, much to Oriana’s dismay. But since she’d supposedly gotten hurt jumping out of a tree, he wanted to make sure she wasn’t bored. That ankle injury kept her from doing many of the things they all enjoyed; it even prohibited her from participating in the weapons training classes, much to everyone’s disappointment. When the Howes finally left for Amaranthine, he couldn’t help but wonder if he would get another chance to spend that kind of time alone with her. He certainly hoped so, and judging by the secretive smile she gave him as he left, she did too.

**Author's Note:**

> This was written sometime in 2011, and I really didn’t feel like editing it (I might go back later & do so). The only change I made was to include a vague mention of the Trevelyans, since in my head, the two families knew each other (Eleanor & Lady Trevelyan grew up together).


End file.
